Life Interrupted

Each day I wake up with optimism that things are going to be OK.  Lately, they haven't been.  We have been struggling the past month with my daughter's irratic behavior.  She has autism and that coupled with teenage angst is just a toxic combination.  

Its been 4 months since we've started working with ABA therapists from CARD (Center for Autism and Related Disorders).  They have definitely made an impact on Alexa in a positive way, but we have too many interfering factors that are competing with the desired outcome.

At times it is so discouraging cause we are so proactive and are willing to try just about anyting it takes to make our situation a little more manageable.  Unfortunately, it is a frustrating road we have ahead.

I hope that we can straighten out her medicine management so that we can optimize her mental health and well being.  As her mom, it is horrifying to watch her suffer through these episodes of impulsive and explosive behavior.  

As for myself, I am forging ahead to be the best I can be in terms of my health and piece of mind.  I am the CEO of myself and my children.  I am making decisions on their behalf which will affect their future.  Focusing on myself with my health and fitness goals allows me to take time for myself.  

My goals are a "great distraction" to dealing with constant stress and disappointment.  I am not disappointed at my daughter, only myself in how I react to her.  

Is it unfair to say I wish everything would be OK or I wish we didn't have to deal with this?  I don't know, life is unfair sometimes!  I guess its how you play the game of life that makes all the difference.  We're still learning, one day at a time!